why i want children young

a little over a week ago i was asked in an interview ‘where is your heart?’ i wanted to reply, ‘my children, who i already love whole-heartedly (even though they are only just dreams for now)’. but for fear of being controversial and misunderstood, i replied with what i thought they wanted to hear. ‘my photographs’. the journalist laughed and said ‘i thought so’ and i cringed. i say i’m for realness and honesty in my work but i am keeping quiet a huge part of who i am. i want children more than anything.

it began when i was quite young. i became fiercely maternal towards my dolls and bears, i began dreaming up long lists of baby names and i started looking after my little sister and cousins. when i grew older i became interested in parenting and childhood’s affect on later life, reading parenting books and watching my friend’s families interact. there is something about the young that has always fascinated me. a naive, pure happiness so easily broken. i started having nightmares about miscarriages and infertility. i asked my friends ‘is it normal to want to have a baby so much?’ but they didn’t understand.

a question that is often asked during interviews is, ‘what inspires you?’ my childhood inspires me! my life began on the water, inside a houseboat. my parents were wild, free and my father painted me while my mother photographed me and we were all wrapped up in the beauty of life. after, we lived in a caravan and soon after that, a house in avalon crawling with vines. my mama’s hair and my father’s beard was so long and i knew they loved me because they told me so, they said ‘i love you to the stars and back’ and i knew it was true. my father would tell me dreamtime stories with such passion they’d feel real and my mother would read me books late into the night. my father ran away to follow his dreams (something i struggled with but accepted, it gave me strength to do the same) and me, my younger brother and my mother moved to townsville. our love lane home was little but it had an enormous mango tree in the backyard. i’d sit on the grass, shirtless, gnawing on the juicy seed of a mango and it’d run in rivers down my skin. years later the smell of rotten mango is one of my favourite smells.

my mother began dating another man and the rest of my childhood was conventional. we had bedtimes, a suburban home and pay tv. i was sent to a private catholic school and my mother stopped painting, laughing. i’d hide in the stories i wrote, in the worlds i created. suddenly having an imagination wasn’t important and stories weren’t things to be told with passion, the tv was more interesting and i should watch that instead. my mother pulled me and my brother aside one day and asked ‘do you want to get our own home? we won’t have much money or pay tv or a big house with our own rooms but it will be just us.’ and we said ‘yes’ and meant it with everything. it took seven years and then suddenly we were no longer playing happy families, we were actually happy again.

my images are often coloured with memories and moments of my youth. i want to raise a child with the unconditional love, inspiration and adventure of my own childhood, so that they too can be inspired as i am. it’s what i always knew i was meant to do. the reason for all i’ve learnt.

much of society seems to think there is a ‘right’ way to live life. a formula. finish school, go to university, climb the career ladder, get married, settle, buy a house, have children, have granddchildren, retire, die. it’s strange that something so outdated is so widely spread. i was told i would never become a photographer if i didn’t finish school. people my own age sometimes ask, why are you acting like an adult when you’re so young? shouldn’t you be out partying and actually being a teenager? because there is a right way to be the age you are! well i guess i am a rebel by not being rebellious then. isn’t it all ridiculous? sometimes i think about this and ache to be brave and push aside my fear. and so i’m going to be loud about what i’m passionate about, even if i’m not supported.

why do i want children young? even though i’ve been in love with matt since i was newly fourteen, i have never had a single doubt in my mind that i didn’t love him. our love is something i can’t explain, but it has withstood disaster after disaster without crumbling. it is the only thing i can rely on in my life, the most beautiful thing i know. we are both writers and photographers, extensions of the other. some relationships are based on sharing the same taste in music, me and my lover share almost everything. ever since we moved into our own home together (a year and a half ago) we’ve talked about having children. we thought if i became pregnant, we’d explain it was an accident, scared if people knew we had consciously WANTED our baby they’d judge us negatively. it makes me wish that people would see us for our thoughts and actions, not how many days we’ve been alive.

i always saw myself as a young mother. a mother with enough life and energy to keep up with my children, enough imagination to dream up things along with them. one day maybe they will look back at all the photographs of me playing with them and think, my mama is pretty. people seem to think you should stop living when you have children, you should settle and stay. but i could never. they’d be missing out on too much adventure. all of us can travel and experience together, making memories, photographs, stories. the photographs i’ll take of them will be some of the most real images ever, so full of my heart and passion. when i think of them i hardly want to shoot anything else. most people may want to live first and then have children, but for me, having children will be living.

i am so blessed to have the job i do. i might travel across seas to shoot campaigns but i will always come back days later, with stories and pictures. my career has the kind of freedom very few do. the reasons for the negativity surrounding young mothers doesn’t make sense with who i am, regardless of age. and besides, i am not thirteen or sixteen, mentally i am not even eighteen! i know who i am, where i am going and who i love and that is beyond so many. my decision to have children early may be an unaccepted one, but for me it makes all the sense in the world. think, would the world be more disgusted if a 39 year old woman accidentally fell pregnant to a child she had no time for, or if a 19 year old had a baby out of love and a want to raise children? the most important thing is love and time to love. 

 

 

disclaimer: i am not promoting teen pregnancy, i am promoting open mindedness and following your heart without fear.

146 love notes for “why i want children young”

  1. Donna

    What a beautiful inspiring story.
    It’s amazing how we all feel like speaking up will allow others to judge us yet there are a million people feeling the exact same way.
    I’ve seen my friends have kids young and they are all so happy while the ones studying and growing up all don’t deal with their issues.
    Sometimes the wrong decisions lead you to the right place.
    Beautiful story.
    Thank you

  2. Marie

    I had my son when I was 20, similar to your age too. I love being a young mother, I’m able to understand and dream with my boy. Being a young mum to a beautiful boy is
    Life with my family & son: http://smittenby angels.blogspot.com

  3. Savannah Wynne

    Never before have I seen so many of my thoughts in someone else’s words. This is the exact feeling I have had since I was just 2 years old (and I’m nearly 19). “Fiercely maternal”. That’s exactly it. I have all of this motherhood in me and no way to express it. It’s exhausting, and it just bursts out of me in the meantime. Thank you for writing this. And congratulations on Alba, your sweet dream. xo

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  5. rebekah

    beautiful nirrimi, ive finally found you and im reading your blog from start to finish. its so beautiful reading this post, knowing you have your beautiful daughter now. i know this feeling so well of wanting a child…and knowing you would be such a good parent. i read ”attachment parenting” when i was 16, ”spiritual midwifery” when i was 18…now im 25, still childless so far though i feel like they are all inside me already waiting for their chance <3
    beautiful work. i love your fashion photography but i truly adore the photos of your family…real to the core…no stageing, no makeup just bliss xxxx

  6. Abbey

    when i read this i couldn’t help but start to believe in kindred spirits. i am 19 and have been going through the steps of, how you say, the “right” way to live life. i am only just beginning to understand that it is okay not to follow the steps and make your own. Nirimi, you don’t know me but your words just touched my heart. they are all the things I have been feeling for so long but couldn’t express. thank you.

  7. Ruby

    It’s like you just wrote every feeling I’ve never been able to express. I too have always longed to be a mother. At seventeen everyone is telling me what I should be doing, partying, drinking, My mother practically begs me to go out to parties, she’d faint if she knew my dreams were of children. My father tells me time and time again “children tie you down, don’t have them if you can help it.” He doesn’t even have a clue. I don’t tell people how much I want a baby, because I know all I’ll hear will be “babies aren’t dolls” “get a puppy.” Like I’m some mindless teenager who can’t comprehend the difficulties of being a mother, they’ll think all I want is to play with cute baby clothes.
    But it isn’t true, I dream of giving my children a childhood, one I was denied, a childhood full of magic, wonder and adventure. To let kids be imaginative is so heartbreakingly rare now. I told a five year old – lets make up a game and he asked “how?” I had to teach him to pretend there were dragons and fairies.
    If I grow to be even as half as brave as you I will live a life similar to your, sadly I’m not there just yet but one day, I will dream until then. Thank you for making me feel a little less lonely.

  8. Jay

    Fore give me but I think you are bat sh!t crazy. God I’m 23 and not even ready for a full time girlfriend. Also you said you travel for your job, good luck with that after you have a kid

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  11. tana

    i know this was posted a while ago…. i hope you fought for what you wanted and i hope out of everything you found happiness regardless of what people said.

  12. Destinee

    Your life, your love, and your passion inspire me, day in and day out. I sit here and read your words, and I’m overcome by the peace and the joy that ooze from what you’ve written. You make me desire a free life and a full life. I cannot express how truly and honestly thankful I am that someone like you exists in this world. Everything here makes me heart and soul soar, and I can’t wait until I can pursue my passions and dreams as you have pursued yours. Thank you for everything, Nirrimi.

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  14. Amelia

    I’ve spent majority of my day now reading every word. the number of days you have lived show’s so little context to you who are as a being. i would have thought you were 100 if i was guessing purely off of the words you write. it’s refreshing. i don’t think i’ve ever felt so touched by someones word and images as i am yours. thank you for helping me see a life i only thought i could dream about.

  15. Rau

    Just like you, I want to have a site where I can write and post my own works of art. When I was browsing your page, I was thinking: I’m older than her and she’s passion-driven. I’m living in a restricted world. Full of pressure and my dream is just to far to reach. I grew up differently from yours. But reading your posts really makes me happy. It makes me feel your gentle heart and your warm youth. You inspire me to become better, that whatever situation I’m in, I’m always loved and there’s always a way to make your dreams come true. That life is a matter of chasing dreams, making it a reality and live in it.

  16. Evelyn

    Wow. Incredibly beautiful words. So inspiring. I just read this and the “about me”. When I did that, a wind of peace of hopw fulled my heart. I´m 23 years old and last year I decided to leave everything and do what I love to do that is art. I´m so happy now. A couple of months ago i met someone through an art website. I just said “I love you art” and he replied. And from then on we love and love each other every day more and more. I´m from Argentina and he lives in the States. So it is hard sometimes, but the love we have for each other gives as happines and patience. When I read your “about me”, It was so ecouraging and I show it to him. I told him..you see we are not alone into this, us can be possible.

    Then, I am not a mother, but I love so much but so much the children who are dreams now. sometimes I tell them that I love already love them with all my heart.

    So, I just wanted to say THANK YOU. Your words really make me think, and give so so much peace.
    A big hug for all of you :)

    p.s: Sorry about my english mistakes. :) Have a nice weekend!

  17. Justina

    Nirrimi,

    You are a beautiful, fearless soul & I cannot express how much it means to read your honest words.
    Anybody who comes into contact with your work could not help but feel the passion & emotion which guides it, surely a positive force peaking up out of the mess & noise below.
    Never stop writing & shooting with that same energy & even though you may not see it you are certainly not alone in your convictions.

    Justina xx

  18. Julia

    this is so beautiful!
    and it’s just how i feel
    thanks for sharing this
    for me it’s really hard as well to express how much i’ve always wanted children, since, well, since i can remember really! i would say it and people wouldn’t know how to react, as if someone wanting to give love wasn’t normal… just because of age.
    i’m 22 and can’t wait to meet this wonderful little people that are to come
    love love love

  19. m

    Nirrimi,

    I could read this over and over and for some reason I never get tired of it. It reflects everything I believe in and more. Why should it matter how old you are when you become a mother? If you can love another being with all your heart it shouldn’t matter the age you choose to do so. Many times I have considered having a child (I’m 19) but just can’t bring myself to do it yet because I fear what others might say or how their lives (my family) will be impacted. I know I could love a child now, but fear it might not have the childhood I would like it to have because of expenses. This being said, why should it matter if the main thing is that it’s loved? I guess I will just wait and see where the magic of life takes me.

    Thank you for being such an inspiration as a mother to me. Alba is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and your life is a living fairy-tale.

    All my heart

  20. selvi

    dear nirrimi, i just stumbled across your blog some minutes ago and i must say: i am so awed. the way you document your family is so beautiful and inspiring. i am soon turning 23 and as of now have no direction in life but recently moved countries to be with the man i love since i was 14.
    i read this post and it sums up all of my thoughts about having a family. i wish i was as courageous as you, but i have not the passion you have for photographing and the oppertunity to work so successfully in that field. i wish i would.
    this post showed me how much i am stuck in this cycle of expactation. and how much i don’t want to be in it.
    thank you.

  21. Antigone

    I am 20 years old and have recently fallen in love with your blog. Your images are more beautiful than anything i have seen since moving away from my mountains and their stillness. I have wanted children for so long. I yearn for them with my entire body and have a special pull on my womb begging for a baby. To read your posts and watch as Alba is blessed to grow with you and Matt, I am crying tears of jealousy and joy. I too am trapped in a time of negative thoughts toward those of us who do not “follow the path of life,” but instead march to the beat of our own drum. May life be as good to you as you are to your beauty, and I look forward to reading more.

  22. Marta Cabral

    Let me share my opinion with you, and I hope you read it…
    I am 24 years old, and untill this very moment I always said I wanted to live before having a child, or not having a child at all. I never had the motherly feeling most women of my age have, I never had this willing to be with children, to act as a mom to dolls. I never wanted to be a mother, I never thought I was going to make a good mother anyways, do I would rather not have children. ever…
    I just reat this post, and it changed me. In deep down my heart, something clicked, just by reading your words. Of course you can live and be a mother, of course you can be happy, enjoy life, and why not along with a part of you? As if right now I am crying because suddenly I imagined myself traveling and photographing with a baby, and I would never in a million years have a thought like that. So thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes, and to realize it’s not a bad thing, it’s not and obstacle to be happy and to live a 100%. Be happy Nirrimi… God bless you and your family.
    Thank you*

  23. Arlene

    I have to say this touched me so deeply… down to my very core and soul… in my life i was always told to act a certain way, get good grades, go to college get more good grades, then get a high paying career, have children maybe at 30, and become wealthy… my family was very cold… and my dreams have felt destroyed till i read this article… my real dream was to marry young, have kids young, travel, and live then a quiet comfortable happy life… i didn’t want the glamour, but to be surrounded at old age with contentment, and books to read as my last friends, but then i felt crushed when i saw how dead others were and realized that the dream i had would never come true… now… i have hope again… i’m still young and this time i want to live my life for me, and no longer for the expectations of other :) you are like an angel to me, i have felt so dead and lost until i read this, my dreams are once again on fire, and i never want to lose sight of them again, thank you, from the bottom of my heart and soul, you have made me feel alive again in a world i thought was dead :) you have given me the greatest gift imaginable and i will never forget it for the rest of my life, by reading this, you have given me the gift to love life once more, and for that i will thank you :) i wish you well in your life and hope that you never lose sight of your dream, since you have reignited mine, for this, stranger, i will always thank you from the bottom of my heart, for today you helped to bring back to me what i thought was lost forever… thank you :)

  24. Brenda Cecília

    Aww this is so beautiful, made ​​me cry! I’m 17, but always dreamed of having a baby soon, but I’m in college and it is not possible now. I count the years to get married and have a son, will be the best day of my life. Kisses to your beautiful family.

    (I am Brazilian and my English is bad, sorry!)

  25. Cheyenne

    That was truely beautiful what you wrote. Its really nice to see that there are still people like you who see the positivity in life and what life can create. It reminds me olso of myself, i think that children are the most amazing thing in life too. When i was asked wat are youre biggest achievings in life i said: I want to be a photographer, be a good mother with lots of childeren (not on a very young age tho :) ) i guess that was suprising to hear for my teachers and classmates, but i still till this day feel that way. I will do anything in my power to be the best mom i can be for my children because you are the most important in that time of there lives, i know how it felt like to sometimes be understood ore not be taken seriosly and then its you’re job as a parent to stand behind your child given it the love it needs so it can live life with love, positiveness and be happy. That are for me the true values in life! Thank you for sharing youre story and thoughts.

  26. Yaël

    Wow… what a life. I mean, you’re trully magic! You have a beautiful way of thinking. i wish i was as strong as you.

    “people my own age sometimes ask, why are you acting like an adult when you’re so young? shouldn’t you be out partying and actually being a teenager? because there is a right way to be the age you are! well i guess i am a rebel by not being rebellious then.”

    It’s so true, I’m 16, and i don’t want to be a “teenager” (in the way of partying, drinking, etc). i think i’ve always been an adult..
    thank you for existing, for your gorgeous photos and texts. i wish a fantastic life to Alba and her parents,

    Yaël
    P-S : (i’m french and my english is poor.. sorry if i’ve made mistakes)

  27. Karla

    Thank you for writing this. You are truly an inspiration. Everything you wrote made so much sense. What is the point in living the ‘conventional’ way of life? We are here for such a short amount of time, why do the same things as everyone else or what is ‘expected’ of us in society? In order to further enhance and embrace life, we need to step out of this conventional lifestyle and learn to be our true selves. You are truly unique.

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  29. Angeline

    My thoughts exactly! This is why I also want to have babies early– to keep up with them. I agree with everything that you have written here. Just beautiful. I’m so speechless.

  30. renata

    i feel the same, though i’m already 25 and i don’t have any children yet. but i do feel the same and i hope i’ll be blessed with a life in my womb and a lover who wants to love me and our children as much as i’ll love him and them. I just think that’s what matters, and i think, like you, that is so so sad and it hurts me, it really does, when someone says “you live and then have your kids”, oh god, my parents were soy young when i showed up and they lived, i was their life among everything else they loved, i was their life, and then my sisters, having a family is your life, i cherish those moments, my childhood being out and about with my young parents, on the stage while their rehearsals, painting and playing the guitar, hanging our drawings with tape to the walls… I don’t think there’s an age for that, your soul can be young or old no matter when you were born, the most important thing to me is to be free, to embrace freedom with responsibility, to love and take care of yourself and others, to be passionate about your choosings, about your children, about your job, about your love story.
    Sometimes i feel i’d already want a family, but the truth is that everyday i’m getting better and better, and learning so much, loving so much and feeling so so much love coming to me just from everyone and everything, so it nurtures me so one day i can be a good mama.

    so much love for you

  31. Beverly Penn

    I love the raw candor of your blog. Just found it a few days ago, and I am awed by your photographs, but perhaps more so I love your fluid writing. I am studying literature, 20 years old, and I too can’t seem to adopt the typical behaviour of those my age. I am engaged to a man more than twice my age, and we so badly want to start a family. This entry resonated with me on so many levels — it depicted the kind of life I want for my children, free from societal mores and restraint, free from repressive conventionality. I wish you and your family great joy and peacefulness, and hope you continue using your gifts. Such passion is one of the most important things in life, or as Thoreau said, “most men lead lives of quiet desperation”. Here’s to continuing the rebellion against such a life.

    Kindly,
    Beverly Penn

  32. Clara

    I feel the same way… so beautifully expressed. Thanks!

  33. n'tima

    You made sense of everything I have been feeling lately. I am nineteen, been married since I was eighteen & trying for a child ever since. I haven’t voiced my desire to be a mother out of fear of rejection, and judgments, but you pieced everything I’ve wanted to say together for me. Thank you.

  34. Meeka

    Thank you!
    You have put into words what I’ve been struggling to explain for years.. Your situation and my situation are so similar. I have always felt that my soul is much older than my body. I have been told by family, friends, teachers, mentors, and many others that I seem a lot older than I am. I am going to be 19 in a couple months, but I’ve been told that I have the body of a 14-16 year old and the mind of a mature adult.
    I had the same experiences with dolls and young children, I even volunteered at daycare centers for many of my early-teen summers. I’m in a stable, committed relationship right now, and I desperately want to be a mother. Our living and financial situations are about to improve to a point that would make it a lot easier to have a child, but my partner is hesitant. We’re both homebodies, and don’t really go out and do things much, but he’s worried about losing potential freedom.
    I had been trying to find a way to describe how I feel to him, and he’s been trying to understand what I’ve been saying. What you wrote might be able to help me explain how I feel.
    Thank you!

  35. zieta

    i just wanted to say that you are an amazing person and a huge inspiration. i got sick young, falling into a depression that has lasted over four years. it got worse than usual and i ended up in a clinic after doing something unthinkable. I’m scared to have children now, after realising that i could hurt them in the same way that my mother hurt me. during the last year, i lost interest in things, everything really, and lost my appreciation for beauty. i remember clearly, on a rainy evening, finding your blog and thinking ‘this is beauty’. it jarred me and helped me to hold on for a little longer, purely because i could feel. your photographs and entrys made me feel. now, a year later, i came back and i wanted to say thank you. thank you so very, very much. i don’t know if you’ll read this but i just wanted to say thank you and i hope that your darling alba is doing well and you have a wonderful, wonderful life.

  36. V.

    Don’t listen to what Mila said. I think these thoughts you shared should be read by all, to open up minds a little bit. I always enjoy your whole-hearted visuals and stories.

    V.

  37. Camille

    Nirrimi,

    I too, have longed for children from a very young age. I still long for them, not having been as lucky as you to have already had a beautiful, loved child. Mentally I am not anywhere near my age, and physically I am being told that this is something that I am ready for, so just as you said: it’s not the amount of days that we’ve existed that determine whether or not we are ready for a child, it is whether we know well and truly within our hearts that we will love that child. Thank you for writing this post and summarising it so well; I could not have put my thoughts and feelings about the topic into any better words than you did.

  38. Erin Cheyenne

    i’d just like to thank you for expressing so eloquently what i never could. my friends ask me all the time why i want kids so young and now i have an answer…i can relate to this so well. i have wanted kids young ever since i was about 15 and now i’m just waiting for that wonderful person to share that with. i would also like to thank you very much for being such an inspiration…the day i discovered your deviantart at 15 was a day that literally caused a change in my life, i have been following your journey and work ever since that day and began following my own photography dreams. i hope to one day experience the all the wonder that you appear to have in your life. i wish you and your family so much happiness. XoXOoXo

  39. michisayshi

    i only just read this, but my god it's so beautifully written it made me cry. i'm serious. i myself have often felt a lot older than my actual age (i'm now 24, and i don't know what it "means" to be 24, nor did i know what it "meant" or should feel like to be 15, 18, whatever, i just know what i feel), so i get where you're coming from. you should have children when you feel ready to have children. if you can support them and have a loving partner (which you do, according to this), i really don't think people should judge you based on your age. i also agree on the part where you write about not having to settle down if you have a baby – absolutely not! it doesn't necessarily mean you have to reinvent your beliefs and become someone new, someone "settled", i think it's important to follow your passion and share this passion with your child.

    anyway, thank you so much for sharing this.

  40. Marleen

    Thank you. Thank you for sharing this. Really. You are a big inspiration (doesn't sound very original anymore but it's true!)

  41. Sierra Iola

    when I first found your blog, it was of your homebirth of little Alba. And goodness, I loved how passionate you wrote about your baby girl. I am the same, and this post is very inspiring. I have always had an overwhelming maternal instinct, this lovely want for a child since I was young.
    Perhaps, the want for children is just deep within our souls. Or perhaps it is from witnessing so much beauty and inspiration, there is nothing else that seems as worthwhile as carrying a child and sharing your beauty and warmth the world can give with a tiny human created from your l o v e.
    I'm not sure, but I do really adore reading your posts N. I hope you and your new family are doing wonderfully.

  42. pauline

    i cannot get over how wonderful you are. i come back here all the time, reading and looking through your blog, seeking for the courage that you already have.
    thank you for being you.

  43. Heather Belle

    You really do have a beautiful soul, I wish people could be more open minded like you, and be less afraid to step away from what society accepts as right. You really are an inspiration.

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  45. Jamie

    What people don't get is, you already have a career, and a home. You can support a child and are in a loving relationship with someone who also wants a child. Most teen moms aren't in the position you are and shouldn't have a child. Heck, many 30+ women aren't in a good enough position to have children, and yet they do. I support your decision, my mother had me two weeks before her 18th birthday. She was married and I was planned. I just hope you're ready to face the crying and sleeplessness. I wish only the best for you.

  46. Linda Pochinda

    my head is filled with so many thoughts. i can't explain them or the feelings that were running through my body while reading this. i can only say that you are one uniqe, beautiful girl with a pure soul.
    may all your dreams come true

  47. Chesney

    i think you will be the most beautiful pregnant girl there ever was.
    young mother's are such a lovely thing.
    i hope all your dreams come true.
    love, ches.

  48. claire

    I have never visited your blog before today, but this post found its way to me. I love it. And I mean LOVE it. You have a way with words, thoughts and images x o

  49. Wallis Kate

    Today I randomly landed on your blog and as I looked at the pictures you took of children (your sister and cousins mostly) I felt that you had the same fascination for childhood as I have. And then I saw this post. I completely understand your feeling. I've had baby names lists and books for years now, and I've read a ton of articles and stuff about parenting. When people ask me what I want to do with my life, the first answer that pops in my head is "having children". My friends only begin to understand how much I want to be a mother. Just like you, I don't believe that having kids doesn't allow you to live your own life to the full. It makes your life better, even more beautiful than it was before.

    Thank you so much for posting this, it made my day.

  50. Blissful Lights

    I find your blog so inspiring! You have alot of wisdom for a 19 year old.
    I agree completely that society thinks you should follow a certain pattern in life and if you don't go along with it, you are not normal. I dislike convention, what the world thinks of as 'the norm'.
    I am 30 years old with 3 children and a wonderful husband. Someone the other day said to me 'wow you did the whole kids thing young' and it irritated me that I just said 'yeah' and not something more. But why should we justify ourselves?
    Anyway I homeschool my babies and its amazing, I don't care that they don't do what 'normal' kids do. They are free, happy, well educated and we have fun and get the chance to do things other children who would be at school can't do. I love having my children around me and they love being with me and thats all that matters.
    You have a beautiful outlook in life and I am sure you will bring some amazing children into this world.
    PS. Your photography rocks!
    Check out my blog http://blissfullights.blogspot.com. I am just getting started :)
    xx

  51. Rajani

    My childhood was peppered with a few beautiful moments. I remember all of them, some from age 3.

    I want to escape again, into the world you see, but its hard to believe its still out there sometimes.

    If you have a problem being just 18, I have a problem being already 18. I don't want to move forward.

  52. tomorrowneverknowsfashion

    Wow, you are so inspiring. It makes me sad that I don't really know who I am and that I didn't know who I was at 18 and I felt so lost and confused. I don't even know you but I feel proud of you for who you are. Is that strange? I've just discovered you this morning through another blog and I find your writing and photography to be beautiful and moving. I've been dabling in photography a little this year but I've been loving it from a distance since I was in high school. You really make me want to go out there and just shoot. And you inspire me to go out and live.
    OKAY enough heavy stuff, great work and I will be back to read/see some more!

    Emily

  53. megha

    my comment is greatly insignificant to the others i can assure you, but i felt the need to express my emotions after reading that. i am seventeen, fell in love at fourteen and i can completely relate to most of which you have stated. ever since i was a child i would read my mama's baby names books and make lists i hoped i would need sooner than most people expected. good luck in your energetic, inspirational being.

  54. sueño_despierta

    I love that you are so unapologetic with what you think and you write what you feel and live how your heart desires..thank you for that…you inspire a daydreamer such as myself to think that maybe I am not crazy after all :-P

  55. Mikaila

    Honey… I understand that you are young and hippie and liberal and all, but please do mind that you have a lot of young / under-aged readers who maybe not as "wise" as you are… who could be persuaded to dropping off their school as well and go travel and make babies while they're still babies.

    Please be considerate, I know you're not encouraging anyone, but your poetic words can be persuasive.

    You, and your piece of mind should live in Fairy World where hatred and money don't exist, but as long as you stay breathing in this so called Mother Gaia, "not-average" human like you (hey you claim it yourself) should tolerate the "average" human, that is what I call: acceptance of life, which leads to solid maturity.

    Keep your philosophy to someone you are sure won't be harmed because of it.

    Love, Mila.

  56. Monica

    You write so beautifully, your heart is so much in every word you said in this and I can see so much how much it means to you. I can't wait to see you have some beautiful little children and see how wild and adventurous they will be, They will have such a great life with you as their mother!

  57. CAROLINE.

    I've read this post of yours quite a few times and each time I can feel your passion, desire, and love of life and not caring about the rest of the world; it makes me want to do the same. Thanks.

  58. Rovan

    Thank you so much for posting this!
    YOU are my inspiration when i take pictures. i think of how much you love it and how you're inspired and that inspires me so much!!
    I think it's great that even though you're a young soul, you've thought about a lot of things that many teenagers your age might have not and sharing this to your readers just makes it all the better :)

    Keep living and sharing us your adventures
    xx

  59. Marie

    just a little note from norway! wow, i didnt know you had shot the diesel images they are great and congrats on your success! :) also would like to add that as a young woman who have never really wanted children, this made me at least think about the beauty of having a baby… but then again, it's a hell of a struggle and more so for that of a young person who is not in your position. you're probably not wealthy, but i'm sure you earn more than the average teen mom working at mcdonalds, and that's why society thinks it might be not as healthy for everyone to have babies at a young age, also a lot of teenage pregnancies ARE in fact accidents its not always beneficial either for baby or parents to be born into such a situation. if you want babies, have em! just my 2 cents, even if you didnt ask for opinions :)

  60. ilovefrenchboys

    thank you for writing this post.

    i wished i had read this earlier & not today, because a week ago i had an abortion. i wanted so badly to keep it out of love, but because of society and my parents, i couldn't and i didnt. there is not a day that goes by that i do not think about it and live without guilt.

    thank you so much for pointing out that sometimes, all we really need is just unconditional love.

  61. Monica Robinson

    Couldn't have said it better myself. You are gorgeous. From one young mother to (future) another.
    M x

  62. KAJA JEAN

    I know this sounds so corny but I actually cried with happiness and appreciation and inspiration while reading this post of yours, and I do not cry often (though sometimes I wish I did). thank you so much, you have added life to my day! I'm eighteen too, and though I've always wanted to wait to have children until I'm older, I feel really connected to you through your writing and I think I have a similar outlook on life as you do. I wish you all the best ♥

    xo
    kaj

  63. Lex

    Nirimi, you are very courageous. Not all would want children so badly. Not all have such passion and love and yearning for a child to hold and kiss and touch.

    I am sure you would make a good mother and your daughters and sons would call you the very best.

    Lex

  64. Aimee Clarke

    What you have written has perfectly explained everything I've felt for years. When people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, all I wanted to say was a mother, but whenever I did, people just said 'No, a real career.'

    Now I'm at uni studying a degree that's heading nowhere, barely passing the classes because I have no ambition to do anything but meet someone I love and start a family. The only thing keeping me studying is the knowledge that you can't get a job without a degree, and I want more than anything to be able to support them. I just wish I had the same talents and experiences and opportunities as you, so that I might be able to earn my living doing something I love.

    When you said "most people may want to live first and then have children, but for me, having children will be living," you really hit the nail on the head. It's how I've felt for so long, and no one has understood. My family doesn't accept that sort of thing – my sister's 25 and unmarried (yet in a committed relationship for 6 years) and her baby was just born, and that was still frowned upon.

    I know it sounds strange coming from someone you don't know, but you're a beautiful person with amazing talent, and I honestly hope that you get everything you want and more.

  65. manzana

    Everything you wrote is really beautiful. I want children as well, but honestly not so young. I want to travel first and see the world, and meet people and listen to their stories and lifes and take photos.

    I don't think imagination is a matter of age, and I'm sure that I'll play with my children as much as my parents played with me, i'll let them create their own world and i'll let them share their stories with me, and we'll create new ones.

    i grew up in a really special family, my father owns a bookstore, and love plants, i grew up in a house with a really really big yard, full of birds, squirrels, trees of all kind of fruits. i also remember the feeling of rotten mangos beneath my feeth. i look back at my childhood and i see this watery smiles under the sun, red flowers and trees dancing with the sun, my mom singing songs to me, and the trees dancing once more along with the wind in the nighttime.

    As i see it, age is not the same as being mature.

    If i could give you an advice of any kind… never stop dreaming and beliving in those dreams. never stop doing anything you want to do, only because is "unnatural" or "weird" for the rest of the world. Be yourself, and make mistakes, but live your life fully, so that when you become old and look back, you realize that there's nothing you would change.

    i wish you the best of luck in everything that comes ahead of you, and success in everything you do.

  66. simplistic

    Don't even bother thinking about "stigmas" and conventions. Acceptable age of child-bearing has changed drastically throughout times and cultures (think Quinceanera in Latin America). You are no ordinary "underage mother", but a strong, well-shaped personality, and a demanded photographer, with a coherent view on parenthood and an independent source of income. You can do it ))

    Dammit.. You know, your lengthy outpourings of sincerity about your life (in words or images) make it very easy for a reader to become a vicarious participant in it..

  67. Rebecca

    While I am writig this, my little boy is playing with his fingers and laughing. He es only four months old but it feels like he has been with us forever.

    I am 22 already but still I know the feeling you describe. We also didn't know how to tell our parents, friends, colleagues, that we wanted someone to share our love with and that we planned on having children soon. „At 21? While you are still at university? And just founded your own business on the side?“ People would have called us crazy. So we didn't tell them before, but after. We didn't want to lie though, because we didn't want our child to hear one day that it was an "accident". We wanted the others to know it can be a perfectly sane decision to have a child at this age.
    And what happened? Everybody was happy about the surprise and even the sceptics got used to the idea, that having a child doesn't mean the end of life, but the beginning – at least for us. Yes, it is hard work for both of us, but every second of it feels right. And how often do you get that?

    Not everyone makes a good mother or father and there is definitely people who probably never should have children, no matter how old they are, because they can barely stand themselves. You can be perfectly happy without children, there is nothing wrong with that either.

    But if you feel like you will explode with love soon and you think two people isn't enough anymore, don't let anybody tell you to be content with what is supposed to be the "usual way“.

  68. Brentasarus Rex

    I am a young dad, hell bent on never slowing down and living life with my family. both my partner and I are designers and run a shop along side our 9 month old son. I'm 22 now, and plan on being a large part of my sons life for his whole life, not just part of it :) Beautifully said, and I cannot agree more with everything you have said, this is the opinion that NEEDS to become the norm.

    Brent

  69. Den April

    возраст человека определяется его состояние внутри, и никак снаружи.
    вы прекрасны.
    удачи вам)

  70. MelissaJayneCurtis

    Absolutely amazing. I've been thinking about this all day and now I'm reading something written by someone who thinks the same way. Thank you :)

  71. Dreamer

    They say having children you experience a love like no other. Do what your heart desires Nirrimi clearly it hasn't stopped you before so go for it.

    Nothing like a baby's smile touch and smell. I work with them so I know the feeling and I'm not even a mother myself. All the best for when that time arrives!

  72. ashtonap

    even at 19, you would be a better mother than most. don't let people restrict your idea of the perfect family, because no one actually knows what one looks like.

  73. Junè

    how beautiful l if may on day your child looks over your blog and reads this.

  74. asmallhandinmine

    Oh, I have wanted to hear it put like that for so long. I had my son at 17, and there is so much stigma in society. I always knew I would be a good mother and it truly is the best thing to have ever happened. You are so inspirational and your children have so much to look forward to even though they are not yet born. What a wonderful life you have had and what a wonderful life they will have too.

  75. Hilary

    Your writing is so beautiful, I had tears in my eyes after reading this. You are such an inspiration, not only to me, but to others as well I'm sure. Your childhood sounds wonderful, and obviously made you who you are … I really hope someday I can meet you.

  76. blog

    A very good read! It's so surreal and moving… I admire you for being you, keep your dreams high and go for your intuition. Keep writing, keep on posting, you moved me so hard.

  77. Mariya Olshevska

    Good for you! I also wish to have children young! One should have vigor and energy for the children and if you're mature emotionally I don't see why age should be such a big issue.

  78. cata

    I don't know how to explain this well, without making it sound weird, but nirrimi, you are like one of my own children; the characters of my stories.
    You see, i'm a writer, and everytime I lay my eyes in your blogs or work, it feels… close, sort of a deja vu, something i have, or will eventually create.
    It actually makes no sense that I'm able to comunicate with you, that you in fact exist , and are out there, that you are real; a teenager of my very same age, a teenager that rides in the same page as I do, in contrast of the others.
    This is not meant to sound creepy, is just that I feel that this are the sorts of things that are not meant to remain unsaid.

  79. karen

    gosh, you're not the only one. i've been wanting babies since i was 16. i'm 20 now and i assure you if i were in a loving, secure relationship like yours i would've had at least 2. i wish you all the best. God bless you.

  80. Giugiz

    Hej, I've been following you for so long now.. I'm that kind of person who lives her life in her dreams.. At least, what I would like to live. My real life is conventional, I've been to high school and later to university, architecture, and now I've almost end it. But was it worth?
    I'm not happy even it can seems so. I'm not satisfied: I've always been under pressure because of my family who is so close-minded on certain aspects and, weird, so open on others! I'm not even sure that I want to be an architect..!
    But I'm not strong enough to change my life, I'm not strong enough to go against my mum who has done everything for me and I thank her for this, but who can't see me with an unconventional future. I've not even a boyfriend with whom I could dream with of beautiful places. I've been lucky enough to travel a lot around the world and in your beautiful land too: I've crossed from south to north, from east to west :)
    But I feel like I can't change things.. Keep live your life with your dreams!! All the best

  81. mariana

    i would love to meet your children :) they will be lovely and cute too ;)

  82. maria

    This is deeply beautiful. I remember feeling like that a year and half ago. Now I have a little girl and everything just makes sense. Every day is beautiful even what is normally tagged as "hard". Before having her the fears of infertility and miscarriages were always haunting me, infact when got the positive test i kept testing plenty of days before the first appointment just to make sure she was still with me. And she is, just as I type she's swinging her leg and smiling and it is just a surreal experience.

    Nirrimi you're truely an inspiring person, more so than transporting us with your vision and pictures you remind people to LIVE. Not just think but to do it.

    xx

  83. Candycat

    Thanks for sharing your story
    i'm follow your blog for a while , I love your photos and story

    i'm 24 and life passed so soon as I might not caught up my dream but maybe it's not too late

    I've never thought of having any children I think it reflect something , my unhappy childhood, broken family..I always want to be so happy so full of inspire but sometimes it's just blocked..

    anyway i'm also shoot too and you make me want to take more.
    thank you ^^

    p.s. I've told many friend about you.

    http://www.facebook.com/iam.candycat

  84. andrea

    really, if it's what you want and you are responsibly thinking about it, then who cares what anyone else thinks? you are obviously thinking about all of this the "right" way, if you know what i mean…

  85. andrea

    this is achingly beautiful. you are such a writer, you always infuse magic and freedom into your posts on here. and i find myself understanding and agreeing with you whole-heartedly…

  86. Ada Wada

    I had tears in my eyes reading the first few paragraphs about your childhood. You write so beautifully, I could just see everything in my mind as I read next sentences. You are deffinately not like other teenagers that get with anyone and get pregnant after a few months into the relationship. I'm not trying to judge anyone tho! You are so full of love and passion, so full of dreams and so full of life! And as I can see Matt wants a baby too, right? Therefore it is so easy to see how much of good parents the two of you will become one day and how happy your children will be. It's so very beautiful and really inspiring. I wish you both the best in whatever you decide to do :)

  87. MsThackeray

    I not only wholeheartedly agree, but feel the same. my mother had me young ( she was 21) and it has never harmed me or my life in any way; on the contrary, I think it was beneficial. I am 22 now and would love to have a child; i just have no one to have it with. I dread thinking that I might not have the opportunity to have children before I am 30, even though I so desperately want to… so you´re not alone :)

  88. tegan

    that was beautiful, and very inspiring considering you're still with your boyfriend since you've been fourteen.. as a fifteen year old, that means a lot. xo

  89. Merelle

    This pricked my heart and shook me. I want these and many other things but I am trapped in this conventional lifestyle. I am finishing a degree I hate and feel myself wasting away each day. Please follow your heart, it's nice to know one of us has the courage…

  90. SimoneV

    Your childhood inpsires you . . .. of course . . .. the girl who spreads the word to live YOUNG and FREE. Perfect sense. And what a childhood you had . .. . You're going to create the same for your children?
    My goodness, YOU went to a private catholic school?

    Love that line . . . . being a rebel by not being rebellious . .. . so wise, mature yet so spontaneous and free and all . . .
    Your youth is not being wasted. As compared to all those other "rebellious" teenagers that waste/wasted their time not doing anything constructive, not learning or being open minded, just drinking and partying with the same people in the same town every weekend, same everyday job . . . .such a bane on society.

    I do very much adore how you have come out with this, so openly from the very depths of your heart, and without FEAR.
    Writing, and stepping ahead without fear .. . .two things you are terribly good at.

    HOW I LOVE THE WAY YOU VIEW MOTHERHOOD. Such an alive idea, to have children young so you can enjoy your youth with them, be YOUNG with them. I love the way you think! Even those who may not agree should still realize the person you are, and how you live, and realize it makes perfect sense!!!

    You are so very beautiful. Don't ever forget that.

    I NEED YOUR AUTOBIOGRPAHY!!!! I can't wait I will be the first personat your launch I swear!!!

    http://simonevanon.blogspot.com

  91. Kate

    If a child is going to be loved like that, I think it can't wait to get into this world and I don't think it should have to.

  92. Mani

    Thanks so much for posting this Nirrimi, everything you blog is so honest… it really inspires me, just so you know!

  93. Rakel

    In all honesty, I am not a photographer and I am not good at taking pictures or capturing moments I am going to school to study media and television. I cannot write pretty words but when my world becomes silent I sing. that is truly the only moment I am myself and when everything stops. I am also eighteen and I feel the pressure to have a boyfriend and have a career and succeed but how come there is no more time for love? Or to live? why is everyone settling for second best and why can't soulmates exist? Why why why? ! I am not rebellious I don't party and no I have never done drugs ever. And yes I do believe in saving myself for my true lover instead indulging in meaningless sex with strangers.
    Nirrimi, I am Zecia and even though we will never meet but from this moment I feel it's comforting feeling like I'm not the only one who chooses to go through life with a purpose of love and adventure rather then following the guidelines and rules. I know this message might be just like a million of others you read but I like to thank you for being yourself and for making me feel like I am not the only one who thinks differently.
    I dream about a a little home for me with the ones I love and thank you for sharing your dreams.
    Gracias& mercy!

  94. Mikaila

    don't race your age, darling. what's the youth of that.

  95. Cecilia

    I truly appreciate you composing and sharing this. Your passion for your heart's desires is moving, and though I can't imagine wanting children myself any time soon, I felt your wanting and your love and am leaving this site with a feeling of relating, oddly enough. Beautiful. Have a child, or two, or ten, and share your adventure with them. I can't imagine growing up with you and this adventure and not feeling grateful and loved and full of joy and life. Your children will burst into the world with color and light.

  96. dancepaperlions

    unfortunately, i think young parents are frowned upon because it is usually an accident and not out of love for having children. many young girls i know with children have left the child with their mothers and the fathers have left as well. this is the saddest situation. not many people are ready for children at 16 or 17 (i guess because we are brought up still very young ourselves). i think if you are in a mind space you are (which is very rare) then you should follow your heart! if anything don't think too much about it, let it be.

  97. Autumn Wilson

    You have such a way of explaining things. Your passion and love spill into the words you wrote and it's so beautiful.

    I can only imagine the beautiful photographs you could take. You'd be like a 21st edition Sally Mann. :)

  98. Gypsy

    I love this. You're amazing and never, ever cease to amaze me. Such an inspiration.

  99. Gracie

    Go for it Nirrimi – just do what you want. As long as you know about the responsibilities and hardships, as well as all the good things, then you should be able to do and say what you want with your life :)

  100. mmmarione

    Ahh I finally see what it was about your photography. I always felt that there was something hidden in the folds of your work, that went beyond colour, form and composition and now I see it's the endless flow of love and freewill that gives your work the sense of nostalgia!

    As with children, as much as you want to have one now, I believe it'll happen when it's meant to happen :) & it'll be the peak of your happiness. Good luck with it all

    xx

  101. alanasays

    This was beautifully written and expressed. Isn't it funny that thirty years ago, having children at 19 wouldn't even be an issue, it would be the norm, but now it's this frowned upon thing.

    I find your courage to live your life your way inspiring.

  102. Welcome Stranger

    Letting go and following your heart…
    It seems like the most difficult thing to do nowadays, but its wonderful to see someone do it in practice.

    Thank you.

  103. Samantha Nandez

    You are absolutely right, and could not have expressed it in a more beautiful, thoughtful, and provoking way. Nirrimi, you're truly beyond your years, being rebellious is overrated and a waste of time. Go with yourself, be who you are, and let no one stand in your way.

  104. Emma jane

    I am a mother, I had my son at 16 by accident and honest accident but i love him and am raising him in love with my boyfriend who i have been with since i was 14. :) My son is 1 and a half now and the most amazing child.

    you can see him here http://www.emmajaneforever.blogspot.com

    This child made my life, he brings joy into my life and thats what matters.

  105. Bethany Struble

    amen!
    having a daughter at 16 has been the best thing thats ever happened to me

  106. Chiara

    Frankly I hate when people say:"Oh yes we are waiting for a baby because, just happens or it was an accident." I mean, you were there at the moment! Besides jokes, when you'll be pregnant say:"I'm pregnant because we want it." It's the most beautiful thing for me because it shows a lot of will and commitment. As one previous comment said having a baby affect deeply the life of the parents and also the relationship between them. You have to be "ready" to to that. Obviously I'm not saying that this "being ready" is the same as being older. I'm say just be careful to understand when your being ready is happening, only you'll know. :)

  107. Barbara

    Wow you are so mature. I think that one should follow his/her heart. and love is what matters in the end

  108. ∆ toma01

    beautiful words, strong words.

    why don't you write a book? i'd read it a lot when i'm confused or simply down a little bit. :)

    your life is interesting, but there are no coincidences – you have to be as you're! hope you'll keep describe more REAL feelings of your life, that could give people hope that maybe they can do it different to be happy.

    toma (http://www.flickr.com/photos/toma01)

  109. whenstarsfalldown

    You know, deep down, I've always wanted to have my own child – even if I'm still a teenager. I've always created this image about me being indifferent and cold but the reality … is different. Everytime I see a baby or a child my heart melts and it's like this maternal instinct that makes me behave overprotective.
    I'm really looking forward to having my own child, but the only thing I'm afraid is if I won't have what to offer him.

    I haven't really told this to anyone, just because I was too afraid of this idea of "being too young to have a child".
    Thank you Nirrimi for sharing this and for giving me hope.

  110. Tanya Nel

    I love your honesty and willingness to step out and be different. I hope you will have the courage to speak from your heart next time you are interviewed – the world needs to be infected with authenticity.

    Of course you risk being branded as weird. If you care about others' opinions, then fine – but you'll risk losing your connection with spirit (the muse, or whatever), the moment you sell out.

    Your baby is waiting for you

    Tanya

  111. Just Another Londoner

    I've never even thought about this, but it's bizarre the way people disapprove of young parents, as if they assume their children were 'accidental'. Love transcends all boundaries, and there is absolutely no reason why 38 is a better age to have a child than 18, because as millions have proved over the years, money and 'life experience' are not equal substitutes to wholehearted, all-encompassing love.

  112. JdLobo

    Really, really beautiful, just incredible. Thank you very much for sharing this with us :)

  113. Nicola

    this is beautiful. it's not experience that raises children but it's love. and your words make it clear that you already love them although they just exist in your heart so far. so what else should they wish for?

  114. Julie Victoria

    I would rather you have a child for wanting one out of love, then to say "We were stupid; it was an accident". It wouldn't be very loving to call your child an accident, especially if you wanted it. You should extend your life how ever you want to; it's yours after all.

  115. Alexandra R

    You have a really really beautiful mind and soul.

  116. Plumchutney

    you are wise beyond your years.
    I came across your site because of your incredible photography but am here now also because of your story. I feel like I must be one of your oldest readers as I am now out the other end of the story with 4 kids that we had quite young (not 18 but not far off). they are of course the most incredible part of our life and I wouldn't change a thing but be careful that you have people in your life telling you both sides of the decision. "it won't change our lives" is something we laugh about now – our lives are unrecognizable, sometimes in good ways, sometimes not. Your love for your children will always mean you will do the right thing for them but other relationships can get put under enormous strain. I could say so much more but I am worried I seem like a major downer – whatever you decide to do – a decision is better than an accident ;) and I know you would make an awesome mother. The wisdom and self awareness you have is about 20 years ahead of where I was at your age, now supplement it with a bit of experience from people who have traveled that path, then decide.

  117. Celine From the mountain

    This is amazing. you should really write books!
    You've got exacly the same feelings i have. i want to have kids young too. i'm 14 now, obviously not ready for kids yet, but i would love it to have a little toddler running arround and playing and being happy. I think you'll be an amazing mommy. your kids will love you because you've got such an open mind. they can be whatever they want, whenever they want. and they are loved. I also love that old photograph. it's shows so much freedom.

  118. mona-rose

    beautiful. your words are so honest and captivating. i would even sign that, because i couldn't have put it better myself!

  119. alexiscataldo

    In many ways, I've always understood you. Your incredible passion for your future children, I mean. It has always been like that for me too. Even though I still haven't met the love of my life yet, all I can do is think about him and the children we will have. Sometimes people think that because you are young you have to do what others think is right. "You have to study, have fun, go out with friends, do your homework and shut up." I wish more people could understand this; that girls like you and I exist. It's cool that you shared this with all of us! I loved every single word.

    many many many kisses,
    alexis (the girl from Buenos Aires who sent you a birthday card! haha)

  120. Priscilla

    What I just read was beautiful. So beautiful. There are so many people out there who live young later in life, knowing its the end. You live young whenever and in whatever way you can. I love it. I wish I could say the same thing about me, but I find solace in the fact that there are young people, very similar to me, but not like me, who can marry in their late teens and early 20's, and still manage to love that person, even growing up. You are one of the lucky ones out there who have found love and are willing to live life and have babies so young regardless of what society accepts.

  121. HollieArose

    wow. i think thats all i can say.. you are truly inspirational, and i agree with you. if you really want and love something so much, don't let anything stop you from reaching for it.

    THANKYOU NIRRIMI!

  122. Shawn Adams

    Incredible. You will be the best mother in the world.♡

  123. Brenda

    First of all thanks for being who you are and for posting this on your blog. I am so happy.
    I understand a little bit more how you feel and why you like so much what you do.
    I like the feact that you felt bad for not telling the truth on that interviwe. You really needed to get this out. And it's fine. You are human, you are reached by feelings. We are all reached by them.
    I don't know why you are so fascinated by youth. I understand you want to be a mother, that is great. I can't say the same. I sometimes think I don't want to have childre. But I am just 15 and still have time to think aout it and to change my mind.
    I believe you want to have children because you want to live what you lived bbefore, with your family. You are really looking fot that feeling to come back again not because of memories but because of facts, things that happen to you. And having a baby would be the way. I am sure you'll soomeday be a terrific mother. And motherhood is one of the best things in life.
    Another thing that COULD be happenind has todo with your past life. Sorry, maybe you are catholic or close minded. But well I won't talk about this second theory.
    Enjoy your life, keep dreaming, you'll someday be a mother.
    Whenever you feel it is time you'll know. Age is not a matter to take in.

  124. Victoria Penrose

    Thank you so much for posting this. I completely understood your desire for a child, my main fear in life is that I will never be able to conceive. That day when your told your body physically wont allow you to.
    I cant wait to be a mother.
    I know that so many people feel you should be financially secure, live your life as much as you can before that happens. But children are a gift, something to share your life with.
    This is probably a TMI moment but I just felt so moved by your post.
    I wish you all the luck and every happiness to you and your future children :-)

  125. Anna Dave

    you are so different, it makes you amazing. this is going to sound to damn corny, but you really are one of a kind. your biography only starting from your birth until now would be much more adventurous, interesting and mind-blowing than someone's whole life until the age of eighty.

    you are an authority for me. someone to look up to. thank you for that. because i'm an amateur photographer, only 14 years old and also in love with a boy who is older than me and this means the world to me, to know that someone else has had the same situation and ended up this way, so happy and talented.

    xx,
    anna dave.
    http://www.annadave.tumblr.com

  126. Kate

    I love it. Love it. You are one of the most inspirational people out there. Love is everything. What is the point in life without passion and love?

    Convention is overrated. People ought to do whatever it is that will make them happy. This is something I have only recently realised and wish to pursue whole heartedly.

    I wish I could put my thoughts on this into words but that isn't going to happen.

    Just know that I feel so deeply every single word you've written.

    Kate x

  127. Emily

    this was so beautiful to read. I really liked hearing about your childhood. I think your logic makes a lot of sense, especially for someone who is so strong-willed and able as yourself. your children will be beautiful and have an absolutely wonderful life, without a doubt :)

  128. Second Wind photography

    Thank you Nirrimi!!!!! Thank you for sharing this!

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